So, I’m pregnant.
It is has been fun sharing it with our little world of family and friends and now I have a new inspiration to write about. Don’t worry… I won’t share too much information.
It has always been my dream to be a mom. It is the closest I will ever get (before I die) to understanding how God sees me. It is also the closest I will ever get at giving up my life. That is how I see becoming a mother. Life changes completely because, all of a sudden (well after about nine months), there is this little person depending on my husband and me for all her needs –physical, emotional, etc. I also know that becoming a parent will be the greatest challenge, ever.
A word about the cravings..
It hasn’t been much different than usual. I have really only craved a few things: gummy sour candy, fruit, and red meat. It seems that more often than craving a certain food, I’ve had moments of just being really hungry or thirsty. Recently, I just can’t get enough water.
The things people will say or do…“Wow, you are looking so big!”
For the first six years of marriage, there were always questions about when we were going to have kids or if I was pregnant or not. I even remember the first Sunday at church after we returned from our honeymoon someone asked if I was pregnant. Maybe it’s a good thing that I don’t think on my feet so well because I would have said some things that wouldn’t have been too kind. Now that we are expecting, the comments have changed and are sometimes accompanied by awkward touching.
Would it be okay to touch someone’s belly if they were NOT with child? Nope. I can only assume that it happens because personal filters or boundaries are lacking. Perhaps they are just so excited and cannot control themselves. When my body hadn’t changed at all (that you could see) there were still people who, upon finding out I was pregnant, just felt compelled to reach out and touch me. Without asking, they just walked up behind me and reached around to put their hand on my stomach. I have had the chance to discuss this with a few friends, some have had complete strangers come up and just touch them. It’s just weird, and please if you’re reading this, do not touch people on their stomach when they are pregnant. If you’re curious, ask permission.
The kinds of comments and questions I love are from children. Soon after I started working with kindergarteners and they knew my name they were ready to bring up the fact that my tummy was protruding. It was cute. “Mrs. Rohde, is there a baby in your belly?” Then with a smile and a giggle they would go on to ask about names and offer suggestions. I’ve noticed that the names they chose were often a best friend’s name. Just yesterday at church, a little boy asked where my children were; I was happy to share that my child hadn’t been born yet, and was right here. The girls in the vicinity went on to discuss names. However, that boy wanted to know how that baby got in there. I just said that God had a big part in the matter and changed the subject.
More often than not, when I interact with people who are older and “more experienced” than I am, there is unsolicited advice. I hope, when I reach their age, I can remember what I’m experiencing now. In Malawi, people older than me told me how to dress. Some of them were baffled that I didn’t have a child yet. Here, I was told that I should have worked for a few more years and then start thinking about having children. Just because you’re older, doesn’t mean you can give advice to anyone you just meet—especially when they don’t ask for it.
So far, the most amazing thing about being pregnant is when the baby moves. I felt it for the first time when I was on the airplane on my way to visit a friend. I was traveling alone and just when I was feeling like the air was thickening around me and felt a bit trapped because I needed to use the toilet but the fasten seatbelt sign was on, I felt her move. It was like God was taking that moment and reminding me that I wasn’t alone, not only was He there with me, there was a little person in my belly. My mindset changed right away and I knew we’d make it, together.