Soap Box #1

Asking about Pregnancy, is not polite.

It’s like asking an adult their age, except a bit worse. From my perspective. It’s just NOT okay to do this. Since getting married, it seems like anyone and everyone feels that it’s their business to know what is happening on the inside of my uterus. There have been weeks when I’ll get asked every DAY any of the following, “Are you trying?” “Planning to have kids soon?” “Are you pregnant?” or “Do YOU have kids?”

There are a few specific reasons why one should avoid asking about babies…

Situation #1, these days, any days for that matter, there are people who want to have children, but for biological reasons just cannot. For them, it would be very unsettling to have anyone ask questions regarding children. Since these biological things are definitely NOT public information, no one should ask about them.

Situation #2, say a couple is actually trying to become pregnant, have had miscarriages, or they are in the first few weeks of pregnancy and haven’t shared with anyone about it yet, asking makes them either lie about it or prematurely talk about something that they are not ready to discuss.

Situation #3, what if someone wants to have children, but they are not ready. Financially. Emotionally. They may just want to experience life independently for some time. Etc.

We are going to Malawi and I recently read that in their culture, it is not accepted to discuss personal issues. In fact, if you ask a man if his wife in pregnant, it is seen as a curse and may cause the baby to die before childbirth. Serious. I might feel more at ease with Malawians.

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6 Comments

Filed under faith, family

6 responses to “Soap Box #1

  1. brooke

    I love it! We have all had that weird ask by someone.

  2. Amy Beam

    I agree completely. After a while it was really hard for me to be polite about it or to shrug it off, especially when we were trying, but even before that it got old really quick.

  3. Tiffany

    Hear, hear! Preach it sista!

  4. I think we just want so badly to relate to each other that those of us with kids want EVERYONE to have kids, hence the annoying enthusiasm.

    But I wholeheartedly agree that, for all the reasons you mention, such inquisitions are usually very inconsiderate! Somehow I enjoyed almost 7 years of marriage with very few of them.

  5. Pingback: There’s a baby in my belly… | Catching a little Light

  6. Pingback: Soap Box #1, part 2 | Catching a little Light

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